Untapped rivalries

I've spent so long playing the us vs them game, that I've only touched upon the underlying personal rivalries. This is a consequence of me still being in introductory mode, and my world building like a mofo.

I can simply state that Autumn hates Max, but that's lazy and cheap. I need to show why, and I need to do it MORE THAN ONCE A YEAR. Hey, when you have a universe as complex as mine, it takes a while to get back to these things! As I've whined about this before, nothing in the future is dependent on this (one sided) rivalry being known or not known, nor do the Bud-Dionne, Jacob-Suzette rivalries have much importance for now. Still, I want to be able to tap that resource should I desire it. Looks like I have to up my storytelling skills!

The View From the Ivory Tower

This post was supposed to show up yesterday. (In fact, I can leave it with its original time stamp for the 29th if I so desire... which I ended up doing because I forgot to fix the time stamp before hitting the post button. Whoops.) Problem is, I'm stealing the internet! He who lives by pirated wi-fi, dies by pirated wi-fi. No connection meant no posting.

The other delay came from my grandmother and aunt playing against type and shopping lightning fast. These two are grand masters of social shopping. "Talking to the wonderful people in line is half the fun!" said my grandmother. (I'm paraphrasing, of course, but trying to be as accurate as memory will allow.) Thinking they would be gone for hours, I sat down to write an essay and have a long chat with my aunt's partner, a kindred spirit in the anti-shopping mindset. Thinking I had hours to meander around before getting to my point, I launched into a back story for context. Didn't even finish with that before the shoppers were back. How rude! Anyway, by the time I got back to the laptop, wi-fi was dead.

And now... LOTS OF WORDS AND NO PICTURES!

One criticism I am sure to face when I unleash Precocious on the populace will be the justified accusation that it's all just too negative. Another will be that the strip is unbearably elitist. This would be when I giggle.

An artist can't help but project themselves into their work, and Precocious is very much the dark and twisted workings of my head on display. I like my humor like I like my coffee - intensely dark, then corrected with cream and sugar!

My characters are mean, violent, snotty, inconsiderate and foolish. The nice and redeemable characters either have their good natures abused or are treated like an outright enemy! What is wrong with me? People, please! Conflict is funny.

Precocious was created when I was around 11, and the underlying theme remains the same: It's all about classism. Not only do we have clear divides among economic brackets in the elitist-sounding Gemstone Estates, but we have intellectual elitism on display with the children attending the incredibly elitist-sounding Poppinstock Academy. Who are the worst enablers of this? My main characters! They outright ignore those not like them, down to pretending the other side of their classroom doesn't exist!

That would be the intensely dark coffee mentioned before. The cream comes in the form of the treatment. I'm making fun of myself via proxy with this strip. As much as I like to let my pride prop me up, doing so means I miss so much in life. If you take me out to a bar, I'd likely embarrass myself because I've always dismissed bars as being a home for the base elements. No, in reality the bar is just another social gathering place for all types! I think Dana's amazing story of love and happiness can prove I'm a damned fool.

The reason my kids come off as negative is because their attitudes are foolish. Autumn keeps getting her comeuppance for her competitive streak. Bud is decidedly warped because of his tendency to isolate himself. Jacob's desire to be a part of some grand design often ends with him spending energy on pointless endeavors. Tiffany's space cadet nature can also be seen as a consequence of pure self-indulgence. If I had made my children sweeter, that would imply their intellectual isolation was a *good* thing. These kids satirize the faults intellectuals can have. Intelligence is a wonderful thing. Knowledge as a weapon (the tagline of my strip) cuts both ways.

The character of Max is vital to Precocious. He's a saint and, aside from some blind optimism that strays from realism, he has no personality flaws. My official character biography calls him "history's greatest villain." Max is the control character that needs to pop in every so often to confirm that it's *my* kids are whacked. Later on, the other side of the classroom will also contribute. Kaitlyn Hu is fully sane and perceptive; she's the good Bud. Vincent Iddenstein and Yvette Nutely have their quirks, but they're also good at heart - it's Tiffany and Jacob with creamy souls! Quincy Wozwax is overly competitive, like Autumn, but even he's remarkably social with his nerdy world.

Now for the sugar in this equation. While my characters are often seen as irredeemably evil, there's no way a strip like that can persist without suffocating under its own darkness. The main kids *are* redeemable and they do have souls. Their elitism is the tragic flaw that causes their downfall time and time again; not something that will doom them to a lifetime of evil. They talk big and talk bad, but it's more dark humor than pure evil. They are "haters" that bandy about insults and harsh words freely - but it's not so bad because they all understand the rules of the hater's game. As I've always put it, they hug by hitting! They're normal, but this version of normal is skewed into the darkness.

A Calvin and Hobbes strip once had Calvin remarking how a little bit of antagonism could make any boring conversation into something exciting. The final panel had Calvin beaten into the ground, claiming his point was proven. That's what I'm going for!

For this pilot episode, I've done my best to throw in subtle clues to this. Bud remarks that their conflict is the "current" war, implying they do this all the time. The kids spend more time arguing semantics (and writing official documents) than actually fighting, because the challenge in building a grand scheme is more important than the negative fighting. When it's all over, they walk off content, wondering what they should do for fun the next day. In the end, they just wanted a water balloon fight - but they had to set it up in their way. Just like me, they can't tackle a normal task without doing something foolish to turn it into an epic event.

Even so, the redeemable aspects of my main kids might be *too* subtle. This is where Dionne, Suzette and Roddy enter the fray. If I have Max and Kaitlyn on one end, showing the contrast between my kids and well-adjusted people, I need to have some negatives on the other end to prove my children have sweetness and innocence in them as well.

Dionne is wonderful for that. She is fully aware than my kids talk a good game, but could never fully devote themselves to the path of evil, and she is delightfully malicious in exposing it! Dionne plays the evil game better than anyone, and she'll always win.

Suzette is the big red "Do Not Touch" button personified, always a risk to fly off the handle. She may have *small* point in claiming she's a victim of circumstance, but when she gets worked up her fire burns bright and hot. Again, while my kids scream at each other all the time, none can match the fury of Suzette.

Roddy's role as the outsider helps put my kids' quirks into perspective. He is usually right in pointing out how their attitudes and behavior are unhealthy and unkind, but his bitterness over the whole thing constantly makes him look worse. Roddy doesn't understand the "hater" mindset is another way to have fun, so he's eternally frustrated. Roddy is also my concession that this strip is far from normal. His frustration is fully justified, but he'll never be able to win until he understands of the insular bubble created by the Sapphire Lake kids.

I like my coffee as the intense dark roast, with double cream and one sugar. Get it?

What are Friday nights for again?

Friday is a dead day. Friday TV is a barren wasteland. Friday on the internet is when site updates tail off. Even the message boards empty. On Friday, you have to make your own fun. You are EXPECTED to make your own fun. No matter how pathetic you are, you have to have some social thing to do on Friday. It's natural law!

And then there's me, sitting in my mother's basement, cursing Netflix for now moving instantly and leaving me without the comforting space opera - a genre synonymous with lonely Fridays. (TNT's ST:TNG marathons on Fridays were awesome for making me forget I was friendless until my junior year of high school.)

What else could I do? CARTOONING! I finished the Jacob ramble strip and went on to the Max ramble strip before my brain shut down. So. Much. Text. At this point I could have tried to move on and draw something to excite me, but instead I decided to harvest my misery and use it as the fuel to sustain me through MIND-NUMBING TEDIUM!

Yes, friends, I worked on the Precocious website! Coding tedium aside, I *also* had to scan, size and photoshop all the comics. It took a while to figure out the proper method, but I chose not to look back. Yeah, the first strip didn't come out well. Yeah, I never went back and fixed Suzette's yelling in strip #17. Fuck it! If I stopped to think I'd just collapse in a dull heap!

So now I have 23 strips on the site for the viewing pleasure of the person who reads this. Man, I hope they're good enough. I have my doubts.

My hope is that, as the creator, I am just too close to the work. All I can see now are the thousands of errors and failures in the strips. Too many strips fail on comic timing. Other strips lose their impact because I can't quite get facial expressions correct. The lettering is unprofessional. It's sloppy drawing all around. ACK! Should I be feeling *pride* instead?

Granted, a lot of these problems are due to the inevitable pilot problems. At this is the first look into Precocious, I have to forcefully present the premise and the characters in a way that establish an identity immediately. Instead of nuance, I have to introduce personalities in bullet point format. Thus, as each character appears they inevitably monologue. I *have* to get this stuff down and it's up to me to do my best in making it work. The clunkiness is the consequence of creating a pilot. The BEST creators make it look easy... but I won't get there until I have more experience. Even the most skilled creative types need some trial and error to figure out the best use of their immense talents.

Sadly enough, I chose the *worst* time to post what I had on the web. The introduction strips stop at... strip 24, which will likely be posted later today. Starting at 25, the STORY begins to move and the characters are freed to interact without the "THIS IS WHO I AM AND THIS IS WHAT I DO!" shackles restricting them.

Just remember: For many quality TV shows, a clunky pilot is often followed by a CLASSIC second episode. I sincerely hope that the upcoming strips will make the reader forget the choppy pace of the opener. I'm not saying I will magically become an expert cartoonist overnight - only experience can help me fine-tune the drawing and timing - but if I can end this "pilot" arc on a high note, then there will be hope for Precocious yet!

The strip that broke my brain

Since my work area is currently plunged into darkness, I'm going to combat the situation with something that won't solve anything: WORDS! (And, later, sketches!)

There was a reason the first batch of Precocious strips ended right before things got complex. Not only was I about to take on complex perspective, but the hard-to-draw Dionne was about to take center stage. When it came time to rise to the occasion, I instead ran and hid in my sketchbook. Awesome.

During the gap caused by fear, I took time to reevaluate the whole of the first storyline. While I'm still very proud of it, I wasn't satisfied with the transition between the recruitment of Suzette and the soliciting of Dionne. Originally, after Suzette signed up and I would cut to Bud and Jacob peering out a window at the scene, alarmed to see the enemy's numbers growing. It was fine, I guess, but it felt like it came out of nowhere. *I* may know Jacob's house is located in the center of the neighborhood, but a reader doesn't find that out until later on. (Yes, since this storyline is meant to establish the characters and settings, there is a strip devoted to where everyone lives in the neighborhood. I am awesome like that.) Abruptly showing the boys in a house without any establishment seemed like lazy writing. To add to the confusion, Jacob's mother pops up for one line later on in the story without any prior introduction. It became clear to me: I needed to add in a strip to establish Jacob's house.

The timing wasn't going to be a problem. The new strip would appear before the girl's recruitment drive, establishing that the boys were watching Autumn's effort with puzzled curiosity. By introducing Jacob's mother at the same time, not only do we establish the house as Jacob's, but we know who she is when she leans out her window later to ask why Autumn is trampling her petunias. ("Collateral damage, ma'am!") Even better: By having the eternal optimist that is Deirdre Linkletter point out that the neighborhood is full of children - they're just not students of the Poppinstock Academy - I get to reinforce the insular and elitist nature of my children. Perfect!

Here is where my brain exploded. How the heck do I cram all this into four panels? We need the establishing dialog to cover all the pertinent points, but no so much it obscures the complex perspectives this strip requires. Draft after draft went by where something was just missing. I debating splitting the topic into two strips, but there really was just one worthy punchline. The current version works well enough, but it's best told with five or six panels. Too much for one strip; too little for two. I think I can do it, but it requires masterful use of space and perspective. So, yeah, a master cartoonist could pull this off. I am decidedly a n00b here.

Here's the current incarnation:

Panel 1:
(Jacob and Bud peer out a window in Jacob's house)
Jacob: I'm confused.
Bud: What are those girls doing?
Deirdre (entering): What's wrong, boys?

Panel 2:
(The boys and Deirdre look through the window to see the girls in the foreground working on the booth.)
Jacob: They've set up a booth, mom!
Bud: There's no one to recruit here!
Deirdre: Actually, the neighborhood is full of children your age.

Panel 3:
(Back to the interior of Jacob's house)
Deirdre: Just because they don't go to your school doesn't, heh, mean they don't exist!
(Bud and Jacob give her a blank stare)

Panel 4:
Bud (turning back to the window): What are those girls doing?
Jacob: There's no one to recruit here!

Ok, it's not the strongest of strips, but it's vital connective tissue. I *should* just plow through and get it done, but the perfectionist in me is both frightened of failure and unsatisfied that I couldn't solve my problems with more grace.

My solution to everything is MORE SKETCHING and MORE PRACTICE - which is great but also means NO RESULTS! Below I share a bit of the sketchbook effort to solve my brain rot.



This is a rough of how the first panel will look. This is doable - speech bubbles and character heights align perfectly.



This sketchbook page chronicles a few failed attempts. Panel two is friggin' complex and I can't even set up my characters in their window yet. The stare down - which *should* be its own panel, but can't for space reason - shows how I still lack a full handling on my characters' proportions. Bud's feet appear while Deirdre's body continues. That, frankly, will not fly. Only time will fix that problem, but that is just not soon enough for me! PRACTICE IS SUPPOSED TO MAKE PERFECT! All I'm doing now is unlocking more and more ways to vary how my characters look, thus muddling the issue.

Let me also point out that I draw one lousy water balloon, which is also a bad sign as this storyline revolves around a water balloon fight.

I know what you're thinking. Filtering out the insults about my character, you're wondering why I don't just skip the strip and move on to easier tasks. Well...

1. It's not like the layout is getting any easier. I've been quite ambitious with my design.
2. Since I'm still relatively early on in development, my drawing technique is still changing with alarming frequency. It's been a few months since I last drew a strip already, should I press on and come back later, the stylistic evolution would be alarming clear. When one works with cartoon animals, one should avoid doing something that will jar a reader out of their suspension of disbelief.
3. I'm crazy. Rationality has no impact on me!

There. Another inspirational post from me. YEEHAW!

The rich lives of background characters

Every one of my storytelling efforts is a chaotic conglomeration of countless characters. Complexity is my drug of choice. In my mind is an archive of hundreds of my characters - each one stuffed with history and back story. It doesn't matter if that information never makes it to the page; by knowing minor characters' motivations I can create a richer tale.

What can I say, I'm a guy who watched Star Trek and wondered if the show used the same stable of actors to play miscellaneous crew. It just seemed sloppy to have new extras every week. Wouldn't it be more fun to see the same person popping up in the background again and again? Maybe some lowly ensign (that remained unkilled) could rise through the ranks as the seasons progress - even if he never once speaks or gets addressed by the main cast. That's an awesome touch! For a less geeky twist, imagine the show Lost. There are 40+ survivors out there, although most are boring. I've never checked for, fear of disappointment, but I hope the show reuses the same group of extras for continuity's sake. The hard core fans demand it!

Subtle touches aside, creating characters is a fun challenge for me. We might not ever see this character do anything, but any regular characters in the story hanging around them would. Those characters would be subtly shaped by that random figure walking by in the distance.

What I'm getting at - the Precocious kids have parents. Parents that have shaped them into the crazy souls they are. I'd be remiss if I didn't give them their time to shine. In fact, the second story arc is all about the main cast's parents. With them in the story as full characters, I have that many more opportunities for storylines.

But what of the other kids in the class? I'm planning a story for the future that revolves around a PTA bake sale. Parents will be needed, even if they don't get a line. The challenge falls to me now to figure out exactly who these parents are. I've got to look at their children and reverse engineer. It's a fun experiment, and I'm giving it a shot. My goal is to figure out the families of the nine remaining kids in the class.

So here is an example of the thought process behind the ancestry of one of my characters. In this case, I will examine one of the major secondary characters: Dionne Crup.

Dionne is Bud's foil - a girl who uses her intelligence to exploit the weaker elements. Instead of ignoring the normal world - which is Bud's MO - Dionne actively attacks it. She's a pageant girl, who dolls herself up and then sings, dances and fakes her way to victory. Now, even Dionne isn't so malicious that she'd take this path on her own. She started pageantry because of her parents.

First, what about physical appearance? Because she is from the upper-class Diamond Bluffs, I made Dionne a high-end animal: A cheetah. Logically, at least one of her parents must be a cheetah. Dionne's coloring is also improbable for a cheetah (artistic choice/I can't draw that well yet) so we'll explain that by making her a mixed breed. Her father could be a cheetah and her mother, keeping with the high-end models, a black panther.

Now comes the question of Dionne's family life. Her personality clearly implies she is an only child, so there's no need to think up siblings. Next, we look at her parents' relationship. Is Dionne the product of a happy home? There's no easy way out of this. It could seem cheap if Dionne is twisted from divorce and unbelievable if her parents are happy and pleasant. I'm going with divorced.

Coming from a rich lifestyle, I can see Dionne's mother using her gifted daughter as a status symbol. This would explain the pageantry. Dionne is smart enough to see the motivations behind these acts, but she clearly loves pleasing her mother and enjoys the game. Dionne's pageant wins, along with paychecks from her commercial work, would be the best revenge for a father that left them long ago.

It's time to give the mother a name. Dionne is pretty-looking name, but it can sound flat when pronounced. Still, should one wish, the lettering could imply a fancier voice. (DEE-ON vs Di-yonne.) The mother's name should fit with that. Something like Caryn. That's a name that can be pronounced boring (Karen) or fancy (Cah-rin). I like it. It's because of that borderline fanciness Dionne was given the ugly last name of Crup. There's no way around it, Crup sounds awful. Thus, class and power are needed to offset it.

Another twist appears. Exactly whose last name is Crup - the mother or father? I'm still torn on this. Logically, it would be the father's last name. While I imagine the divorce happened when Dionne was still a toddler, his name would be on Dionne's birth certificate. If Crup was Caryn's last name, that would make her too similar to your stereotypical pageant mom - the ugly southern women barely removed from hickdom and happy to pimp her girl around. Dionne's goal is to make fun of those women, so it's no good if her mom is one. No, Caryn has lived a full live of privilege. She is a panther, after all, which is still exotic.

My current solution (and this could change) is to have Crup be the name of her stepfather. Caryn could have married again years ago (say when Dionne was five or six) after meeting a man who is a great match for her. This is not implying a knight in shining armor by any means. Percy Crup (a first name I made up on the spot) is not an exotic species, but just a regular house cat type. He'd be flawed, but proactive and upwardly mobile. An advertising executive? Small business owner? Real estate agent? (Dear lord...he could be the character, formerly Robert Dobbs, that sold the Pingos their house!)

In some strips I have written for Dionne, I've implied that much of the money she has earned has been wasted on her parents' shopping sprees and online gambling - two clear signs of people who enjoy disposable income. (Provided it's casual gambling and not a gambling addiction - which, as creator, I can say it is.) It might not be the sweetest family on the block (that would be Max's) but it's a happy life for every Crup.

And there you have it. Dionne has a family. When it's time for the PTA story, there will be an elegant looking panther with flashy earrings in the back who seems annoyed and uninterested. At first opportunity, she'll write the other parents a check and drive off in her cherry red sports car.