Saturday, January 9, 2010
This ruins my procrastination plans!
I enjoy video games as much as the next man, but I'm very picky about which ones I play. I don't have the patience for a lot of what is out these days. I like turn-based RPG stuff, like Final Fantasy Tactics. I like games where I can pull off funky tricks by using the rules of the world - such as my expert pokemon breeding experiments! Bascially, if I am going to sink hours of my precious life into something, I want it to be on MY terms. If I like a game, I will go all out with it - but if it FORCES ME then it's hissy fit time.
One of my all-time favorite games is The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass for the DS. It's Zelda! How can Zelda ever be bad? It uses the touchscreen of the DS wonderfully! It keeps everything fresh, making each level of gameplay fun! I like it so much, I don't mind that I've never beaten it! (Stupid final boss.) Needless to say, I was friggin' thrilled when I found out a new Zelda game in the DS style was out! The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks! Instead of traveling on a boat, you travel by train. Fair enough. Even if it's a damn clone of Hourglass, I'll be happy.
What a crushing disappointment that game is. It's like they took all the least-awesome elements from Hourglass, highlighted them, and made everything move at half-speed. This game has been a joyless experience so far, and I'm debating whether to keep trying with it. Right now, I am stuck on a tutorial where I have to play a flute. To play it, I move the flute around with the stylus and blow into the microphone, like I was playing a real flute. Inventive!
FRUSTRATING! It's not fun to do this, and I can't seem to do it correctly, meaning I am stuck repeating this annoying task until Mr. Tutorial lets me go. You know, guys, the music part of these games is supposed to be SIMPLE. Heck, Hourglass didn't bother with it at all - WHICH WAS A GREAT IDEA! So far this game has been all "innovative" DS tricks and no actual fun.
At least I didn't pay for it. I used an Amazon gift card some fool gave my internet-averse mother.
I had such high hopes for this game, and I was ready to devote myself to hours of game play. Now what do I do? Is this going to be the second game in a row that I failed due to DS innovation. (The World Ends With You was fun, but way too complex. Tying all bonus material to a damn minigame was a BAD IDEA, guys!) I don't want tricks for the sake of being tricky. I don't want something so complex the learning curve is insanely steep. I want a solid GAME to play. Why is this so hard? How am I going to waste my life now? All I have to do now is work!
(And yet I'm procrastinating anyway!)